so you're engaged. now what?
So begins a new chapter as a bride to be...
On March 13th of 2020, on the wildly beautiful, impossibly serene coast of Southern Portugal, I said yes to marrying the love of my life — Isaiah — or as I sweetly call him, Z.
In the most ridiculous ways, everything seemed to go wrong that morning. The tides were so high, there was hardly any beach left to sit on. The wind was so wild, the food from our beachside picnic was flying out of our hands and into the ocean. Z got a nose bleed, and as he tried to clean himself up, a wave crashed into him, knocking him into the cold water. Not to mention, the imminent fear of the pandemic laid dormant at the back of our minds, as the night before we were woken up in the middle of the night with news that the borders flying back into America would be closed. It was ridiculous, non-stop, and truly something that sounds like fiction — but with every moment we just laughed, never letting anything upset us.
As the sun was going down and our final day in Portugal was ending, we sat on the rocks with the beach to ourselves, watching the waves crash dangerously close to our feet. We talked about our peaks and pits of the trip, and as I was telling him mine, he stopped me and said that this moment may be my favorite part.
Isaiah got down on one knee, with the sun directly in front of us as if it were all ours, and asked me to marry him. It was one of those moments where time stopped, and I cried just as wildly as those waves crashed at our feet.
take your time
Soon after that intimate, perfectly imperfect moment together, we hardly knew what hit us.
Quickly thereafter, we announced to the world that we were engaged, and in an instant we were inundated with phone calls, flooded with heartwarming messages, and bombarded with questions about our plans — if we had a date set, if I had found my wedding dress, what our colors were for the bridesmaids, if we had toured any venues, if we had chosen our maid of honor and best man, our honeymoon plans... you get the idea.
In a sense, it was overwhelming. Especially given the immediate lockdown upon our return due to the virus that mustn't be named, we were stuck together in our home, unable to celebrate with our loved ones in person. In that regard, however, I suppose we were lucky, because we were able to have so much time together to think about what we truly wanted, without the pressures or wantless (yet admittedly thoughtful) opinions of others.
And with that, my first learning as a bride to be — take your time. Enjoy the moment, for your stage as a fiance will be shorter than your lifelong role as a wife. Listen to your own desires for your special day, but also be open to your partner's, for it is just as important for them as it is for you. And when it comes down to it, go with your gut and try not to sweat the small stuff.
a new chapter
With our wedding date set for May 28th of 2022, I so look forward to sharing some insight from my own perspective, and giving my advice as I learn it in the moment.
And if you're newly engaged and embarking on the tireless, yet rewarding planning process —congratulations! We are in this together. And of course if you have any advice you've learned along the way, my inbox is open.